Dear members of the Wicklow/ Galway Branches
Le déanaí, when I am rambling in the woods, and I talk with fellow walkers the conversation quickly turns to Covid. I am asked if I had been vaccinated yet against Covid 19. When I reply in the negative people then ask which age group is being vaccinated now. Everyone is worried about the high number of new cases each day and also the number of deaths from Covid 19. They are all looking for an assurance that they will be vaccinated soon. I have just now got my vaccination appointment for the first week in April. Halleluiah.
Many within our RTAI group have been affected to some degree by Covid. Firstly there is a large group of people who have family members living more than 5Kms from home who are unable to visit them. Parents and grandparents have missed family interactions. They miss the visiting and holidaying with them. There is a great sense of loss in not being able to see grandchildren and hug them or share in the many glorious moments of their growing up.Children living abroad have been unable to come home on holidays. They cannot visit family members in hospital. Likewise, they cannot attend restricted family weddings, baptisms, confirmations.
This is equally sad for people living at home because of restrictions on travel and numbers allowed at funerals. It is so sad, in these pandemic times, that people cannot grieve properly with the support of family, friends and neighbours. There is a time to grieve and there should be some more humanity shown at this sad time for families and close friends of the deceased. When this epidemic eventually goes away there will be a lot of bereavement counselling needed.
There are many means by which people handle bereavement .I remember when a teaching colleague and neighbour of mine died some years ago. Her husband planted a tree in the centre green for our small community. As we see that tree, we remember her. Her memory lives on for the family and neighbours.
Tá mórán daoine ag imirt “cat and mouse” with Covid trying to stay clear of it. We had two covid positive cases in the extended family group. Fortunately, these were mild cases, and we were all so grateful for this. It still caused some upheaval for family members because of the necessary self- isolating and avoidance procedures.
I also meet people who are anxiously waiting to restart doing the things that were a meaningful part of their lives pre lockdown. They really miss the regular exercise and the social interaction they had in their pastimes. Many people are really missing meeting friends, the meals out, the visit to the pub, cups of coffee and socialising in restaurants and hotels. So am I.
I know quite a few of my walking companions who went to Spain or Portugal for two months every year since their retirement and they really miss it. They tell me that it was so good for their physical and mental health. This is on the lower rung of the losses for me.
There is a term called “Disenfranchised Grief” coined by Kenneth J Doka in the 1980s. He is the author of “Grief is a journey, “Finding Your Path Through Loss”. This term could, be applied to some of the lesser losses experienced by some people I mentioned above. It is worth a GOOGLE search.
I have sympathy for college students. I know quite a few of them and they are being deprived of the collegiality and buzz of college life. They have missed out on social and cultural events. They have missed out on all the sporting events and many opportunities to meet their soulmate for life. This is tough and cannot be replicated for any of them. College life was always a fulfilling and enriching experience full of moments of joy and adventure. It played such a huge part in the growing up and maturing process for all of us. Covid 19 has stripped them of some of this life.
Many businesses are under severe pressure having been closed for so long and many may not survive. Other business premises have adapted well. They have set up virtual shops and have their own websites and changed to some online shopping or to click and collect or click and deliver. This a new experience for all of us and I must admit I enjoy the new shopping experience. I will continue using it to some extent post pandemic.
If there is one lesson, we have learned from Covid 19 it is that we are not alone. There are so many people around us experiencing the same stress, loneliness and anxieties. We must remember that there is so much help and support available.
Our own Seamus Kavanagh put that so well in his latest poem, “ You are not alone” We must do what we can to help ourselves. There is no need to suffer in silence. Share your sorrows, worries, joys and hopes.
When I sent out the March 2020 newsletter one member sent me the following old proverb“ Níl idir saibhreas agus bochtanas ach bliain”. At the end of the year, we are all poorer in some ways as a result of lockdowns. It is time now to look on the positive side and see that there is more hope there for all of us with the arrival of the vaccines.